In that quiet precious moment.
You saw something in me that
I forever seek in myself
Something that said give this little girl a chance
She’s worth it.
I can’t fathom the loneliness around you.
How much of your future,
your dreams altered, did you see?
But in those moments it was you and me,
Just you and me.
An in those precious moments
We had each other,
We had love
I had love before I knew its breath
It’s effect on the mechanics of the mind
In the noises of my night,
that place becomes my refuge.
When the world is knocking me from all angles
When people seek of me more than they’re willing to sacrifice of themselves
When my cup runneth low
And still someone seeks a sip.
My spirit finds solace in that moment
A baby, carefree and unaware
Of the magnitude of the decision you took to let me breathe.
When you looked at me and said
“I’m going to do my best for you
Just stay with me. ”
And when my arms miss the warmth of your embrace
That moment seeks me out and envelopes me
And whatever it is this life will be.
This moment with you, sums up my all.

It started with a word..
And the emotions were riled up
Like a croc infested swamp.
They continued to come through
Tumbling on my sensitivity
Like a brick wall in a storm.
I’d been here before
But I couldn’t stop the pain
I wanted to speak up and throw back my own
But you get addicted to the abuse
Your body perks up for it
Only to slumber in defeat
Each word is a poison dart
Injecting a falsehood laced
In bitter truth.
Frozen in a place and space
That neither wants nor cares
For me
But the fear of the unknown outweighs
The verbal onslaught that’s now
My bread and butter.

Poetry.
My love my devotion.
Refuge . Salvation.
My word when I had none to speak
But the raging emotions of an untamed heart.
My love induces me to that place
Where I must uncover the hidden path
Of yesteryear
Fears hidden in the sands and trampled on before I could comprehend,
Now threaten to break the very foundation that keeps me whole.

They say time is a healer
But the pain sips the through the
Umbilical cord of each generation
And we all bare the mark of deceit.

Now you’re looking at me funny.
You ask me what’s wrong
But your eyes betray your thoughts
You want to hear that I am good
You need to know that I am doing fine.
Your pain glistens through the tears that defy gravity
And If I didn’t know you ?
I’d think you cold.

So here’s my poem
I am fine
I am fine, I am fine broken
I am fine whole.
The pain sometimes induces a momentary coma.
And I look like life has barely touched this soul.

But this song is not mine and its sweet melody chokes me into now.
Where the tides rage
But so do they for you.
So I tell you … Again!
I am fine.
I am fine and I am whole.
Because poetry says so!

Brenda Vengesa © 2013